Litt humor i hverdagen.


Ostemannen

Medlem
25 Okt 2009
15.745
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that-awkward-moment-baby-hand-penis-tattoo.jpeg


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orgy-tonight-free-dickerdoodles.jpg


welcome-to-the-music-industry.jpg


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harman/kardon

Medlem
25 Apr 2005
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Nord-Trøndelag
Annonse fra Finn.



Beskrivelse
SELGER VELDIG VELDIG DYR GS-T (HUNDRE MILLIONER KRONER) (Finn.no godtok ikke denne prisen)

Min sønn på fem år har bestemt prisen. Mulig han kan forhandles med, men jeg mistenker at han har satt prisen såpass høyt for å unngå å bli skysset i en noe sliten grønn Passat stasjonsvogn til barnehagen. En eventuell kjøper må derfor ha usedvanlig gode forhandlingsevner om det skal bli noe av handelen.

Bilen er grei nok. Godt tatt vare på av forrige eier, men har stått i halvannet år. Ikke vinterkjørt i Norge. 4G63T-motor på 210HK. Bilen går godt, fikk norske skilter i juli i fjor og er EU-godkjent til juli 2013.

Bilen selges fordi det ikke er en familiebil. Sier kvinnen i huset. Videre er jeg ikke i nærheten av bilinteressert eller motorkyndig nok til å eie noe sånt. Fortsatt i følge kvinnen i huset. Jeg har derfor, på helt selvstendig grunnlag og av egen frie vilje, bestemt meg for å selge den.

Jeg kommer til å anbefale min sønn å seriøst vurdere bud rundt 70.000,-
Tar forbehold om feil i annonsen. Ikke interessert i byttebil. Ta gjerne kontakt om du har spørsmål.
 

Ostemannen

Medlem
25 Okt 2009
15.745
1
36
Mr Cameron was at a school and asking the children the difference between the
words accident and tragedy, and their meanings.
The teacher asked Mr Cameron if he would like to lead the discussion on the word
'Tragedy'.

So our illustrious leader asked the class for an example of a 'Tragedy'

A little boy stood up and offered: 'If my best friend, who lives on a farm, is playing' in the field and a tractor runs over
him and kills him, that would be a tragedy.'
'Incorrect,' said Cameron. 'That would be an accident.'

A little girl raised her hand: 'If a school bus carrying fifty children drove over a cliff,
killing everybody inside, that would be a tragedy.'
'I'm afraid not', explained Cameron, 'that's what we would refer to as a great loss'.

The room went silent. No other children volunteered. Cameron searched the room.
'Isn't there someone here who can give me an example of a tragedy?'

Finally, at the back of the room, little Johnny raised his hand and said:

'If a plane carrying you and Mr. Clegg and Mr. Milliband was struck by a 'friendly fire'
missile & blown to smithereens, that would be a tragedy.'
'Fantastic' exclaimed Cameron, 'and can you tell me why that would be a tragedy?'

Well', said Johnny, 'it has to be a tragedy, because it certainly
wouldn't be a great loss, and it probably wouldn't be a f...ing
accident either!'
 

Ostemannen

Medlem
25 Okt 2009
15.745
1
36
Two couples were playing cards. Jeff accidentally dropped some cards on the floor. When he bent down under the table to pick them up, he noticed that Dave’s wife, Sandy, was not wearing any underwear! Shocked by this, Jeff hit his head on the table and emerged red-faced. Later when Jeffwent to the kitchen to get some refreshments Sandy followed him and asked, “Did you see anything under the table that you liked?”
Jeff admitted, “Well, yes I did.”
She said “you can have it, but it will cost you$100.”
After a minute or two, Jeff indicates that he is interested. She tells him that since Dave works Friday afternoons and Jeff doesn’t, that Jeff should come to their house around 2:00 PM on Friday. Friday came and Jeff went to her house at 2:00 PM. After paying her the $100, they went to the bedroom, had sex for a few hours and then Jeff left. Dave came home about 6:00 PM and asked his wife, “Did Jeff come by this afternoon?”
Totally shocked, Sandy replied, “Yes, he did stop by for a few minutes.”
Next Dave asked, “Did Jeff give you $100?”
Sandy thought, ‘Oh hell, he knows!’ Reluctantly she said, “Yes, he did give me $100.”
“Good,” Dave says.
“Jeff came by the office this morning and borrowed the $100 from me and said that he’d stop by our house on his way home and pay me back. It’s so good to have a friend you can trust.”
 

harman/kardon

Medlem
25 Apr 2005
43.993
0
0
41
Nord-Trøndelag
Andersen holdt foredrag om giftstoffer og andre skadelige ingredienser i maten vi spiser.
Etter å ha undervist en stund, spurte han forsamlingen,

- Er det noen som kan fortelle meg et eksempel på mat som kan gi store problemer i mange år fremover?

-Jeg vet, sa en mann fra salen, - Bryllupskake!. ;)
 

Starman

Medlem
6 Apr 2006
8.704
0
0
harman/kardon skrev:
Andersen holdt foredrag om giftstoffer og andre skadelige ingredienser i maten vi spiser.
Etter å ha undervist en stund, spurte han forsamlingen,

- Er det noen som kan fortelle meg et eksempel på mat som kan gi store problemer i mange år fremover?

-Jeg vet, sa en mann fra salen, - Bryllupskake!. ;)
:mrgreen:

Hahaha....fin den harman/kardon :)
 

Shallow_

Aktiv
21 Mar 2005
9.656
106
63
46
Somregel når folk blir fotografert i kostyme på ComicCon så prøver de jaffal 'litt' :D

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